This sucks #Pandemic

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I know, how can this be post pandemic when we’re still in the grips of it? At present, the united States stands at 3.25 million cases and the world at 12.5 million. The EU has barred US citizens from entry into the country and the world looks poised for an egregious change. However, I’m holding out hope for an improvement of world status

Me however, I’m having a more personal crisis, As I’m sure many in the world are having right now. See, I’m about a good 7 years into the nomadic lifestyle with a solid 2 of those recent years actually generating steady remote income. I’ve come to enjoy my brand of travel and am generally not used to being in one place for too long. There’s a world out there I need to see and it’s NOT happening right now.

The problem however isn’t the world and what’s happening in it right now, The problem is my reaction to it, Which I’ll admit is a rather poor one. Due to travel restrictions that affected airbnb along with the closure of travel hostels and hotels (coupled with the lost of the RV), I was forced into an apartment. As you know with apartments, most of them have leases. Basically, I put myself in jail.

So here I am with a year lease at an apartment, in a college town with college students around me. This hasn’t been the most optimal of experiences by any stretch of my imagination, any true Nomad will scoff at the idea of a lease. I do know of nomads who have gone back home to family/friends, (which I did pre-covid). I even know of extreme nomads who are riding the homeless circuit right now (eg: shelters) until things change. That’s WAY too real for me, but more power to them.

Locked into a year lease with my only escape of responsibility being a hefty fee or replacement tenant foist to free myself from, Coupled with another “new normal” in regards to travel reality and civil unrest in the US, I’ve found myself in a rather low vibration. The Animals have let me know about this vibration, as dogs in this complex tend to bark at me and seemingly only me. As Depression has begun to creep in, I’ve booked myself a therapist, a pretty cool one at that. We’ll see where that goes. The depression has also begun to affect my personal productivity, Which is vital when you’re a self employed individual. Being self employed doesn’t make your life easier, in fact, it’s MORE WORK.

I’ve even found myself being snippy, sarcastic and impatient with people in public. This manifest into eye-rolling and sighs at people doing anything from standing too close, walking too close, idly standing in a grocery isle blocking the way or just the random happening of arriving at the same point in line as me. In my 40s, I’m hoping this isn’t me becoming a cantankerous curmudgeon of a man. I’m pretty sure this isn’t the case, as I’m generally a happy person when I’m within my comfort zone. This new world however has soured that.

Here’s to hoping for the best through therapy and increased production in my business. I dislike the fact that I’ve let these current events corrupt my nature. It does however show me that I still have a lot to work on, so I go forward with new eyes and an open mind.

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